The Ten (Unspoken) Commandments of Social Media

From Facebook to Instagram to Twitter to Snapchat to Tumblr to Pinterest to Vine and everything else in between (do people use Google Plus…?), there are so many rules and guidelines that we must adhere to before joining the sites. But within the social media community, there is also a deeper unspoken list of commandments that you must adhere to and worship to survive in the dog-eat-dog world of the Internet.

Here are 10 of the unspoken commandments of social media:

1. Thou shall not double post within 24 hours on Instagram.

Don’t post two pictures within the same day and expect me to like them both. I won’t. One per day maximum is the limit. I don’t need my news feed covered in only your face. I have over 1,000 other followers to keep up on, man. Give us all a break.

2. Thou shall always link back to the super cute dress posted on Pinterest to allow others to indulge in their online shopping habits.

There aren’t many things I hate more than finding that perfect dress on Pinterest, clicking on the pin to open up the link, and having it take me to a page to buy a new car or to take a survey. Linking back to original content through your pins allows followers to indulge and treat yo’self during online procrastination (something I know all too well).

3. Thou shall not send out annoying game requests on Facebook.

I ended up blocking grandparents on Facebook because of this. As a general rule of thumb, nobody wants to play Candy Crush Saga, Farmville, or Solitaire with you. Save the requests and keep your account unblocked by your family members. We will all thank you later. (PS you can now block all game requests on Facebook. Read here!)

4. Thou shall spell check all tweets before allowing their hilariousness to go viral.

Your tweet was probably really funny. I probably related to it on a sentimental and almost embarrassing level. But nothing looks worse for the credibility sake than for your tweet to have the wrong form of your/you’re or there/their/they’re before you get fAmOuS. Allow your grammar to be top-notch so I can retweet it and not just give it a favorite.

5. Thou shall include at least one Facebook profile photo of their actual face to allow people to know who you actually are.

Because trust me, I’m not accepting your friend request if I only see pictures of the back of your head gazing off into the distance, photos of your feet in the sand, or pictures of you throwing up the sorority sign in a group of girls. How am I even suppose to tell who you are or what you look like? Nope, I don’t think so. Those requests stay in my Facebook purgatory (the unofficial “waiting for me to accept you” under my friend request section).

6. Thou shall not have a private Twitter account if you plan on spurring up drama on the Twit.

When I am scrolling mindlessly through Twitter and come across a good dose of drama, don’t just let me read one side of the fight. I want to see what the whole crew is saying and I want to grab the popcorn, sit back, and live vicariously through your immature Internet shenanigans. Do us all a favor for the sake of entertainment and make your account public so I can see your clapback too.

7. Thou shall always give good vibes to your best friends through likes.

You might not care about his salad, her #OOTD, his newest family photo, her vacation, her Man Crush Monday or his Woman Crush Wednesday, her piles of school work, or his fresh new kicks. If this person is your best friend, your friendship owes them the .01 second that it takes you to double tap, so get to it, my friend.

8. Thou shall always respect what a “Throwback Thursday” entails.

If you must post a throwback Thursday, it better be at least a year old or greater. I don’t want to see a photo of you in a bikini from last month. I want to see you with braces and a crap haircut, some really obscene childhood outfit, and you in your ugliest awkward stage. The only exception to the rule is if something absolutely incredible happened and you were unable to post it at the time.

9. Thou shall not heart your own Instagram post, like your own Facebook status, or favorite your own tweet.

We get it. Your outfit was on point, your status was funny, your tweet was relatable, and maybe you just need that 11th like to turn Instagram from names to numbers. But do not pride yourself on giving yourself that like or street cred that you don’t even deserve. If we don’t like your post, you shouldn’t either. Don’t be self centered (or hated).

10. Thou shall always understand that a status will never change the world.

I see your political rant, your religious drag on, and your “1 like = $1 to feed the homeless” post. But let’s talk for a second. We can detect when you’re full of crap because (most of us) know you in real life. Don’t be a Mother Teresa on Facebook and then a freak in the streets. If you want to do something productive with your vented up and typed energy, go plant a tree, go to a political rally and protest against Donald Trump, or do something to actually feed the homeless.

Social media is a powerful (procrastination tool), a worthy (time waster) and a central (lifeline) to the millennial society. Use it correctly or deactivate your accounts!


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